Welcome to Grace, Coffee, & Mascara!

This past Christmas, I was working on my wish list {ahem}, and I found a sweatshirt on Zulily that almost fit me perfectly. It read: All I Need Is Mascara & Caffeine. I say that it almost fit me perfectly for two reasons. First, I know with 100% certainty that, even with these two "necessities" in my life, I would be a mess without Jesus. He comes first in my list of essentials, and, really, the other two items could be excluded, but I'm pretty sure that tagline's been taken. Second, the sweatshirt is white and, in this season of my life, white clothes are dangerous. I've got three precious little boys (ages 8, 5, and 2) whose grubby fingers are like magnets to their mother's clothes... especially the white ones.

Grace - I've known and loved Jesus ever since I was a very little girl, but there was a season in my life (longer than I care to admit) in which I tried to do it on my own. I still went to church (when I could fit it into my busy schedule), but I looked at my time with the Lord as more of a task to check off on a list. I had grown distant from Him. I tried to fill the emptiness inside of me with perfection, which led to a great deal of insecurity as I struggled daily to achieve the unachievable. Shortly after my oldest son's first birthday, I went through a long and difficult season of my life. Eventually, I realized that I just couldn't keep doing it on my own. Yes, I had (and continue to have) Dan, the sweetest, most wonderful husband in the world, but even he couldn't measure up to the One who was missing from our lives. I knew our family needed a change, and my husband agreed. (Did I mention how supportive and awesome he is?) We started attending a new church and slowly our family came to know Jesus again. The good Lord used Beth Moore's Bible study Breaking Free to break my proud, selfish heart and replace it with a softened one that was so very thankful that He had not given up on me. (Honestly, I would have given up on me if I were Him.) I remember driving home from Bible study, on more than one occasion, bawling so hard I had to pull over to the side of the road. More than five years later, I think of how far I've come and am overwhelmed with a feeling of gratitude. By no means am I there, or even close to it. I still allow the chains of materialism and perfectionism to wind themselves around me from time to time. But the difference is that now I know that I am walking with Him. Living in his love and grace gives me the courage to face each day and to enjoy the journey, even when I stumble.

Coffee (my preferred source of caffeine) - I am not, nor will I pretend to be, a coffee connoisseur. We don't own a Keurig, though I'm hoping for one for my birthday or Christmas. (Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, wonderful, supportive husband!) I rarely go to Starbucks because of the cost and, when I do, I always order the same thing. If it's spring or summer, I order a peppermint mocha frappucino, no whip. If it's fall or winter, I order a peppermint mocha, no whip. I haven't indulged in (much) caffeine for about five years, because I've either been nursing, pregnant, or trying to get pregnant. However, every morning, before I can drag myself out of bed, Dan has already delivered a hot cup of Folgers Classic Decaf lightened with half-and-half to our bathroom counter. So when I finally can bring myself to stop hitting the snooze button, I am immediately reminded of my husband's love, and I am able to pretend that my steaming cup is full of caffeine. It's a placebo effect.

Mascara - I could write an ode to my beloved tube of L'Oreal Voluminous mascara. I do want you to come back to my blog, though, so I will spare you. I will go so far as to say that it's magical. I mean, it even comes with a wand. {Ba-dum-bum!} I have some very dear friends who often go without a stitch of makeup, and they are beautiful. Being a wife and mother of three young boys (with a fourth little gent on the way), I am always looking for extra time in my day. At some point during the past year, I decided to try, like my lovely friends, to go without makeup. Although the trial proved somewhat successful (my husband and oldest son claimed not to be able to tell the difference), I would walk past a mirror and think, Who is that? She looks tired. Or sick. Or both. Not only did I look and feel more tired, but I also found that without a thick coat of mascara on my lashes, my eyes actually stung and felt watery. Weird, right? After a few days of this, I decided to bail on my experiment and find that girl I recognized in the mirror. Although I wish I could rock the bare-faced look like my friends, I've come to terms with sacrificing five minutes each morning to apply makeup. I want to be and feel like the best version of myself... for God, for my family, and for me.

Thank you so much for visiting Grace, Coffee, & Mascara. I wish I could meet you over coffee, but let's plan to meet back here. I'm excited to share homemaking hacks, recipes, information about our journey in homeschooling, my attempts to make our home a more beautiful and comfortable space, and lots more.

Truly,